Just hearing the word “divorce” evokes stress, anxiety, and heaviness — even for the happiest of couples who have no intention of ending their marriage. So imagine what it does to people who are getting divorced. Just when you think you’ve got it all together, your life unravels. You are far from being emotionally or mentally prepared, and stress levels are at an all-time high. It can be so bad that you may even ask, “how do I deal with the stress of my divorce?”
Look, we’re not going to pretend that stress isn’t already a huge part of everyday life. We face external and internal stressors all the time, and how we respond to that stress plays a big role in our well-being.
But divorce is a significant, life-changing event. A few of the physical and emotional effects of stress are:
- Depression, anxiety, and guilt
- Lasting anger and resentment
- Lower life satisfaction and identity problems
- Trust issues
- Difficulty with future relationships and marriages
- Increased health issues
- Substance abuse
7 tips to help you deal with the stress of your divorce
It goes without saying that you need to hire a lawyer if you are going through a divorce or are fearful that your marriage is headed in that direction. But don’t just hire any lawyer. It is important to have a family law attorney in your corner who understands the stress that comes with a divorce. They will listen to your concerns, calm your fears, give practical advice, and be that compassionate voice of reason. Nelson Law Group, PC prides itself on being that law firm.
The point of this blog post is to share practical tips and stress-relieving techniques, especially if you’re at your wit’s end and wondering, “how do I deal with the stress of my divorce?”
This almost sounds too good to be true, but taking a few minutes every day to do something as simple as breathing in for five counts and breathe out for five counts is easily one of the best ways to lower stress in the body. The American Institute of Stress endorses several breathing techniques and even a few tools that can help you master your breathing and stop the stress response that typically comes with difficult events such as divorce.
Write down what is going right in your life
When you’re in the middle of a divorce, it can feel like everything in your life is in shambles. While it is easy to focus on the negatives during this stage of your life, try little by little to create a culture of appreciation and gratitude for what you still have (a roof over your head, kids to laugh and play with, clothes in your closet, a warm smile from mom or dad, etc.). A great way to keep track is by using a journal. Having a dry erase board in your kitchen or near your desk at work also helps you redirect your attention and improve your stress levels.
Be around people who care about you
No one should go through the stress of divorce alone. You need support. Maybe it’s your parents, the friend from high school who has been by your side after all these years, or a close co-worker. They need to know you need their love and grace now more than ever. You’d be surprised how the simple act of spending time with people who truly have your back lowers your stress levels.
Focus on your children
While it’s true that your divorce can flip your entire life upside down, don’t get so preoccupied and stressed out by it that you forget about the impact it is having on your children. Be with your children. Have fun with them, and show them how much you love them. You’ll be surprised how less stressed you are if you focus on living in the moment with your children.
Let your lawyer take the wheel
People who ask, “how do I deal with the stress of my divorce” need to realize that one of the easiest strategies is to avoid trying to tackle everything on your own. Just like you’re okay with turning your tax paperwork over to your CPA, let your lawyer do the work for you — especially the technical stuff that will ultimately stress you out. They can even speak for you to avoid unnecessarily unhealthy conversations.
Make a plan for the future
The future may be uncertain, but if you had your way, what is the best-case scenario for you? What does that look like, specifically? What are the obstacles you might face (finances, work, where you’ll live), and what are the best solutions to those problems? If you have a plan in place, you begin focusing on what you can do vs. what you can’t do. And God willing, the stress of the here and now will subside.
Know when to ask for help
No one is prepared to deal with the stress of a divorce, even if it’s something you know is for the best. This is where sitting down one-on-one with a counselor, your pastor, and even a psychologist can help you process your feelings quietly and confidentially and help you adjust to change. If you are finding that the stress is too much, it’s time to ask for professional help. Remember, it’s okay not to be okay. There are people who can help.
Call Nelson Law Group today!!
If divorce is the answer, you need a trusted advisor to guide you through each stage of your divorce and help you deal with the stress that naturally comes with that. We work diligently to achieve a result that ensures you receive what you are entitled to as you move forward onto the next stage of your life. The Nelson Law Group brings nearly two decades of experience in family law to each and every case.
Give our knowledgeable staff here at Nelson Law Group, PC a call if you have any further questions regarding this or any other issue. Our staff is always available. Give us a call today! For more information about Brett A Nelson, click here.